UGH….just ugh.

Hey everyone!

Hope you’re all doing well! I’ve been feeling helpless the past few days. If you’re unaware (I’m not quite sure how you could be at this point-lol) but, I broke my wrist last week. And it sucks. I really can’t do much. I have to rely on people just to get my basic needs met (shower, hair,etc.). I hate having to ask for help with everything…EVERYTHING. UGH! As a result of said injury, I can’t really cook much, because I can’t chop anything, & it blows. As a result, my paleo life has been suffering. It freaks me out that my old habits could come back so quickly. It was like I had never even started paleo. But I’m happy to say that I’m back on the wagon. I’m not going back to where I was- ever. I’ve worked too hard to get here.
 Sorry to sound like a Debbie Downer, but this really effing sucks. I have no idea how para or quadriplegics do it. I’m not sure it’s possible, but I have even more respect for them than I already do! I know I should be grateful that I only broke it, & it will heal, but right now I can’t help but feel sorry for myself.

I  only went to crossfit twice last week.  I felt so terrible about myself. It was almost like I was having withdrawals. But I was feeling like a nuisance in class, since I need to have legit everything scaled, & I still didn’t have a hard cast on, so I took some time off. All I’ve been hearing from my mom is “you should just walk or do the elliptical & eat less.” I love my mom, & I wouldn’t be anything without her, but if I hear this one more time, I’m going to off myself. I know she wants me to be safe, but she’s not understanding that Mike is working hard to make sure the WODs are scaled appropriately for me. When showing me how to do certain movements, he even makes pretend he has a sling on! I could not love him more- seriously- I know I say it every time  but he’s the best! Eventually, my mom will come around, but for now I’ll just have to keep her out of my head, & continue on my journey.

I just got my hard cast on today- so I’m hoping things will get better, but I don’t know. The doctor read my CT scan from Friday, & let me know that I actually broke my radius in 14 places! And I also may have a torn ligament in the wrist. Awesome news for a Monday. So, I’m in the cast for 6-8 weeks, & I’ll most likely have to do physical therapy after- Which I don’t care about b/c I had physical therapy on my back last year, & the therapist was so hot! LOL. Ohh Travis- he was awesome- sort of looking forward to seeing him!

I’m finally going back to work tomorrow. Dare I say I’m glad to be going back to my normal routine? Maybe I should ask myself how I feel after tomorrow…off to bed now- leaving my negative thoughts behind, & focusing on how far I’ve come. This is just a temporary setback, & I’ll get through this. Thanks to everyone who has/is encouraging me to keep gettin’ after it…Love you all! ❤

Effin’ box jumps…

Hey everyone!

So as most of you know, I fractured my radius on Friday at CF- I apologize in advance for any typographical errors, as I only am typing with one hand. LOL
Anyone who knows me, knows that I fall a lot. Like all of the time. However, I have never sustained an actual injury- just a broken ego. If you have been following me on my journey, you know I had a recent battle with box jumps during the open workouts. I couldn’t step up onto the 20in box. I overcame that obstacle & felt like a million bucks. So I thought for this wod, I would try doing an actual jump on to the small box- I think it’s like 9-10in high. Mike was there, so I knew I would be okay. Here’s the wod:

12 min. AMRAP
7 Squat Cleans (135/95)
12 Box Jumps
500m Row as fast as possible
Easy enough, I thought. I couldn’t do the squat cleans at 95lbs, but I could do 55lbs. So I set my station up with my barbell & small box. We didn’t even start yet, and I was already freaking out over the box jumps. I’m certain Mike saw it in my eyes, because he instantly went over and got a 45lb plate for me to jump on- & kept adding weights until I felt comfortable. I finally decided to give the box a try. I didn’t get on there fully- but both of my feet were on there at the same time-even if it was for a split second. So it was 3,2,1, go & I was off. I busted through the squat cleans, no problem. Then I moved to the box. Mike was standing right next to me. He kept pushing me to keep going- not to think about them-just keep moving. I needed that. Most of the time, I am my own worst enemy. I think I can’t do something, so I instantly give up. Having him there- telling me to keep going was exactly what I needed. He kept saying, I don’t care if you fail every time, you are gonna keep trying until you get it. It felt like I did a million of those stupid box jumps- I had lost count. Finally, I had got through the first set- after like 20 attempts. I busted through the second set of squat cleans & was back at the box. Mike was back. I feel like I’m always monopolizing him during class. Luckily, he was secondary coach, so I could steal him & not feel bad! I was struggling through them, but he was there & I knew I could do it. Until I fell. My station was setup close to the pull-up rig, FYI. I made it on the box, I actually fell while stepping off. I fell backwards- barely missing my head. I think I tried to break my fall by sticking my arm out. That was not a good idea. I knew that something was wrong when I looked at my arm & instantly started crying. It was not in its normal position. I was too shaken up to get off of the floor, so I was just sitting there, holding my arm, crying hysterically, while the rest of the class finished their workout & the next class was waiting (& presumably staring at me). Mike was trying to get me to sit up, but it wasn’t happening. Chris went over to the very convenient liquor store that just opened next door, & got me some ice. Finally, I got up. I took my big bag of ice, mascara stained face, & broken ego to the conference room. 
I was more upset & embarrassed that I fell, than of my actual injury.Yeah it sucked that I got hurt, but I would get over it. I would not get over the fact that a gym full of people, & specifically two very handsome gentlemen saw me go down…not so gracefully. While I tried to calm down, Mike was so great- he sat & talked with me & gave me chocolate for at least an hour. I could not ask for a better coach. Seriously, what gym can you go to & get chocolate & a built in therapy session? I love it there. While I was feeling sorry for myself, Mike told me to write down a list of accomplishments I’ve made since starting CF in January. I can’t write because my gimp hand is actually my writing hand- FAIL!! So once I find a scribe, I’ll work on that list, but for now I can add those box jumps to my list of PRs. When I started, I couldn’t even get my toes off the ground. So even though I have to be in a cast for 6-8 weeks, and all of my wods are going to have to be scaled, at least I know I gave it my all & didn’t give up. You know what? Eff that box. I will get back on there, & even if I fall again, I still tried. 
This injury isn’t gonna hold me back. Once I get my permanent cast on next week, you better believe I’ll be back in the box scaling & getting after it. Nothing is going to stop me. It’s going to be extremely difficult to do anything with this stupid cast, but I know I can get through this. It’s just a  minor setback. 
To everyone who helped me/ will help me-thank you. You don’t know how far a positive comment can go.
I’m sure other important stuff happened this week, but it took me about 2 hours to type this, so it’ll have to wait until I’m back in action! Love you all!!  

It’s over…

Hey guys!

This week has been bittersweet for me. Yesterday was the last of the Crossfit open workouts. On one hand, it’s good because maybe Mike will calm it down with the crazy workouts (I highly doubt it, but a girl can dream!). On the other hand, it’s going to be sad, because we won’t have anything to look forward to on Wednesday nights! However, there was a big announcement- our box is going to be hosting an internal competition in June! I can’t wait! It’s going to be so fun, and will bring back the competition aspect that I’ve grown to love so much. I would have never thought that I would actually enjoy competing in any type of competition- albeit a crossfit one! I guess I have a secret competitive side- who knows? 🙂

This week’s open workout was cray. Seriously. Here’s what it consisted of:

Complete as many rounds and reps as possible in 4 minutes of:
65 pound Thruster, 15 reps
15 Chest to bar Pull-ups
If 90 reps (3 rounds) are completed in under 4 minutes, time extends to 8 minutes.
If 180 reps (6 rounds) are completed in under 8 minutes, time extends to 12 minutes.
If 270 reps (9 rounds) are completed in under 12 minutes, time extends to 16 minutes.

Here’s what a thruster is-
Here’s what a chest to bar pull up is-

First of all, I’ve managed to avoid class every time we’ve done thrusters. Usually on purpose. hahaha. Mike really killed us M-W this week- and actually on Wednesday, our WOD was heavy thrusters and pull-ups. He’s like a psychic coach. Crazy. So my first thruster ever was on Wednesday, and I was expected to do 15 thrusters PLUS 15 chest to bar pull-ups in 4 minutes by Saturday. HA! Even if I could get through the thrusters, I can’t pull up- yet, but at least I would have a score to record. On Wednesday, I did my first thrusters at 75lbs- then scaled down to 65lb and 55lbs. At least I would have those in the bag. I was so sore following Wednesday’s WOD, that I took Thursday off. I wasn’t even sure I would get through the open workout, after being that sore! Side note- I’m so envious of the people in my class that can do regular/kipping pullups- but even more so, the people that can do chest to bar pullups are amazing. One day I’ll be able to do them, but when I see people just bust them out, I feel like a failure. I know I’ll get there eventually, but in the moment I feel like I should have already figured out how to do them by now. 
For some reason, this Saturday’s feeling was a little more subdued than it usually is. It was different- not as competitive as the last few weeks. My judge this week was Elena. She is amazing- She didn’t think she would be able to thruster 65lbs, but she did- not once- not twice, but three times. After that third time, she had to scale back. I was impressed- she had never thrustered that much before, but she never gave up! She went first in the heat- which was different for me. I was used to getting done first and then being a judge. I’m not sure I liked going second- it just gave me more time to have negative thoughts. All week my knees have been really tight. I tried foam rolling, rowing, & squatting to loosen up, but they were still super tight. I was nervous that I wouldn’t be able to squat below parallel & therefore my reps wouldn’t count. I think the adrenaline kicked in, and I was able to get down all the way. I did get No-repped once- but no biggie. At the end of the 4 minutes, I was able to get 14 thrusters @ the prescribed weight of 65lbs. I was hoping to get that last one in to make 15, but it didn’t happen. Oh well. Oh did I forget to mention that Mike made it an 8 minute workout – “for intensity purposes.” 4 minutes of thrusters was intense enough for me, thank you very much! So instead of just finishing the 4 minutes- he tacked on an extra 4 minutes, so we actually got a tough workout in. He’s so nice- always thinking of us! haha. When all was said and done, I ended up with 35  total reps- I had to do ring rows instead of pull ups- but they were still difficult. I was happy to just have a score to record! We got to watch Mike do the workout again, which was amazing. He is seriously a beast. He made it up to 121 reps. CRAZY. I was dying after 14 reps, never mind 121. He literally looked like he was going to pass out this time- for real. But once he came back to life, he was back on- & having a beer with the rest of us. We are really so lucky to have such an amazing, down to earth, awesome coaching staff at RCFBC. I love all of our coaches! ❤ 
Oh yeah, after the workout, we had a party! Mike was having a guy from Paleo Power Meals come and talk to us about food delivery & he was bringing by some stuff for us to try (all of which were delicious!). As soon as he said party, I knew we needed a theme. That’s my thing- I LOVE themed parties. You should see my work- I have decor up for every season/holiday- I love it! Secretly, I think I should have become a party planner, but somehow I got into radiation- who knows. So since that guy was bringing paleo food and we were going to the “paincave” during the WOD, the most appropriate theme was Caveman/Dinosaur themed! I go all out for these kind of parties. I don’t think Mike & Lauren expected me to be this intense about it, but they don’t know me very well yet! I knew I wanted to make a cave out of one of the pull- up rigs- it would be the center of attention. I had a vision in my head, and with Lauren & Mike’s help- it came out great! I’m hoping we keep the cave up for a little while- since it’s so awesome! It was great to just eat, drink, and have a genuinely good time with people that are awesome. We did a little med ball bowling too, which was fantastic- even though I am the worst bowler ever. LOL 
I’m sad that the open is over, but at least I will have something to compare to next year! I can’t wait to see where I’ll be in a year. If I’ve made this much progress both mentally and physically in just 4 months, a year will be nuts. For now, I’ll be focusing on the next competition in June & getting better at things that I’m not good at. I’m so glad that I signed up for the open- it has completely changed me. Crossfit in general has completely changed me. I know I say it everytime, but I’m so grateful for my crossfit family. I would never be able to get through these tough times without them & my amazing coaches. I am eternally indebted to everyone at RCFBC for keeping me on track & helping me change my life! ❤ ❤

No Rep!


Hope everyone is doing well! As I sit here typing this, several areas of my body are in pain- shoulders (from 13.4), legs, butt, wrists, neck…pretty much every part. LOL. It’s that good hurt though- the one where you know you worked hard. Anyhow, things have been really great. I am seeing an intense shift in my attitude and self confidence lately. Things that I normally wouldn’t do (i.e. just walking up to a random- not bad looking, guy at crossfit the other day & introducing myself ) aren’t making me feel nervous and self-conscious. This is fantastic. I’m starting to feel good in my own skin- a feeling that I’ve never had before.

I can’t believe how much I look forward to going to crossfit- I have NEVER been excited to workout- ever. Of course, having the best coach ever & and an excellent group of athletes makes it so much easier! I am so thankful for the friendships that I have forged over the past few months. I never had a lot of friends- many acquaintances  but not many people that I could count on. I now have so many people that I consider my crossfit family- I know that they genuinely care for me and my goals, and vice versa. There are also so many new people joining our box, which makes for a great opportunity to make new friends (even though the classes are getting pretty big!).

So yesterday was Easter- and I got a little out of control. Of course, being from an Italian family- pasta is the first course, followed by a second course – usually what regular people would just eat for the entire meal, lol.  My aunt makes this sauce- we only have it twice a year- because apparently it’s so “bad” for you- it has bacon, ground beef, carrots, onions, and heavy cream- served over pasta. It is my favorite sauce in the whole world. It sounds like an odd combination of items, but it is seriously the most delicious thing ever. It’s sort of like a bolognese, but not really. Now that I list the ingredients- it’s not really that bad for you- minus the heavy cream and pasta. Anyhow, we only have it twice a year, so I knew going into yesterday, that I would be having some of that. I haven’t had any sort of pasta product since the beginning of the paleo challenge. I can’t believe how much a small bowl of pasta affected me! I felt so tired after- like more than I normally feel. I had to go lie down in my cousin’s bed!! Suffice it to say, I won’t be having pasta for a very long time. I don’t like the way it makes me feel…even though it is delicious. Then my other downfall- desserts. My aunt made these absolutely delicious, buttery, raspberry squares. They were so good. I couldn’t have just one- I had to have like 2…ok, maybe 3. My stomach hated me yesterday after dinner. Now I know that I can’t over-do it like that. I don’t like the way I feel- physically & mentally. It’s over now, but it was good learning experience to actually see how these foods effect me.

Before Easter was the 13.4 Open WOD. It was a doozie. This was the first of the open workouts where I couldn’t record an official score. At first, I was upset that I wouldn’t be able to record anything, but then I realized that it’s so great that I am even at this stage of the game! The scores are just for me! I’m obviously not going to compete in the crossfit games- so the scores are irrelevant. These open events are just to see where I am this year- and see how I’ll compare when next year rolls around! Here’s the 13.4 WOD:

7 minute ladder
3 Clean and Jerks (95lbs.)
3 Toes to Bar
6 Clean and Jerks (135/95)
6 Toes to Bar
continue adding 3s until time is up

First of all- a couple of weeks ago, I could BARELY get 75lbs for the push press- never mind 95lbs. That’s when I knew I would have to scale it, and I wouldn’t be officially recording anything. But I would try it any way- just to see if I was given some sort of super human strength over the past few weeks- unlikely. I tried to get 95lbs to the clean position at least 5 times- I couldn’t do it. If I couldn’t clean it, then I certainly would not be able to jerk it (that’s what she said!). Even if I could C&J 95lbs, I can’t do toes to bar (yet) so the most official reps I would have got would be 3. I scaled down to 65lbs. Toes to bar are an absolutely insane movement. Look it up on youtube (along with the clean and jerk) and you’ll know what I’m talking about. Your toes have to touch the pull up bar. WHAT???? These people are nuts. I usually just bring my knees up as high as I can- close enough for now. I was paired up with one of the teens- Hayden. She is the daughter of some of my favorite bare-covers, Hillary & Phil. Luckily, Hayden & I could both only clean & jerk 65lbs. So I didn’t feel as bad. She was a great motivator- keeping me updated on how many more reps I had & pushing me to keep going (I think she gets that from her mom!!) I ended up with a total of 43 reps. Hayden got 42, so we were neck in neck with each other. My shoulders are still killing me from Saturday! I love the energy we have in the box during the open events. Everyone is amped up- it’s so awesome.

We had a few very fit- very awesome & incredibly good looking visitors at the box this week too. Whoa nelly, I have never seen bodies like the ones I saw on Saturday. These guys & one girl were beasts. The two handsome, strapping men ended up doing the wod when all of us finished- perfect- so we could watch! I was sitting there with my phone literally snapping pics as they were going ham during the workout. Honest to God, I have never seen two more perfect bodies in my life. Until, our coach, Mike did the wod! I have never seen Mike do an open wod before- so this was really cool- to see him in beast/paincave mode. He ended up doing it after everyone was done. All of us were just standing there staring- even his parents, who were here visiting were watching in awe. It was one of the most incredible things I have ever witnessed. He talks about his “dark and scary place” that he goes to during these open wods, but to experience it, is something else. My level of respect for him skyrocketed following that workout. He ended up with 100 reps. The reigning fittest man on earth came in with 126 reps. HOLY SH*T. It was nuts. We were there- our whole crossfit family cheering on our coach- it was electric. At the end, he just ripped his shoes and socks off & looked like he might pass out. After a few minutes, he was back to his old Mike self. Once again, I’m so proud and lucky to have him as my coach. He is one of the main reasons that I stayed at crossfit following Onramp. I feel like I do better at everything when he is near me- he doesn’t even have to be teaching our class- just knowing that he’s somewhere in the building makes me feel okay. It’s strange- I just need his energy to do well. LOL. Now that I’m a complete creeper…hahaha.

Next week is the last of the open workouts. It’s going to be sad. I have been looking forward to the announcements every week. I think we should do our own open at RCFBC, just so we can keep that open energy in the box at all times. After the wod next week, we’ll be having a party! I can’t wait to spend time- not working out with my crossfit family. It’s going to be great!

So for this week- I’m back on track & ready to bring it! Have a great week!! Love you all!